Keep an eye on house helps to curb sexual abuse - Victim of childhood defilement advises parents

An ardent listener of Joy FM has advised parents to keep a close watch on girls they keep as house helps since they could be sleeping with their young children.

Kofi (not his real name) said this is a result of an encounter he had during his childhood when he was defiled by a house help.

According to him, the unfortunate incident happened when he was seven-years-old.

“My asthma was severe at infancy so whenever I was sick my parents left me in the hands of a maidservant in the neighbourhood. At age 7, she’ll pull my manhood and insert it into her vagina,” he said.

However, it continued until he got used to it and became addicted to sex.

“Gradually I got used to it until I was 12 when the habit became uncontrollable,” he said.

Kofi is among men who shared their experience of how they were defiled by older women during their childhood.

He disclosed that he became sexually active though he was still a minor as a result of this.

Kofi added that the said incident caused him to have sexual relations with a lot of his female friends until he got married.

“After she left, I descended on my female playmates and that lust had been with me until I married,” he said.

He, therefore, advised parents to “watch the girls they keep as house helps because they can be as dangerous as the guys who rape little girls.”

Another victim, identified as Enoch also shared his ordeal.

Enoch was also a seven-year-old minor when the incident happened. He had his first sexual intercourse with a lady, older than him.

“It happened with a young lady who was around 18 years, I clearly remember: she was in her third year in JHS. Though I can’t remember exactly how long it took, it went on for quite a while.

“I masturbate close to six times every day since secondary school days and even had sex with a goat,” he said.

“The image of what happened keeps coming back to me,” he added.

For Darlington, who had his first experience at 17, he stated that he was threatened by the lady, who defiled him.

According to him, they lived with her in the same house, though they shared different apartments and when his mum left home to farm, she would call him over to her room and have sexual intercourse with him.

“She wasn’t married then though. But then, anytime she called me to come to her room, she held my manhood and she kept on doing it. So I told her one day that I would report her to my mum and she told me if I did so, something would happen to me.”

Darlington held on to this threat and was silent until the lady finally passed on.

“I was very worried and I didn’t know who to tell. But one day, the lady traveled and never returned because she had an accident and died,” he said.

Section 101(2) of the Criminal Offences Act, 1960 states that: a person who naturally or unnaturally carnally knows a child under 16 years of age, whether with or without the consent, commits a criminal offense and is liable on summary conviction to a term of imprisonment of not less than seven years.

Though this law applies to both gender (i.e. boys and girls), rape or defilement against boys is often treated with indifference.

The victims, however, advised society to pay attention to the crime especially when it happens to boys since its impact on boys is as grave as it is on girls.